Avoiding Power Struggles - East Hartford Public Schools

NEA - Avoiding Power Struggles with Students
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The dos and don'ts of dealing with classroom confrontations.
By Robert McNeely
Found in: Classroom Management, Discipline
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“I hate you, and I hate this school!”
This isn’t the reaction educators are looking for in the middle of class.
But disruptive and confrontational students are sometimes an
unavoidable challenge. If handled poorly, these confrontations can lead
to power struggles -- and more disruptions.
“I hate you, and I hate this school!” This isn’t the reaction educators are looking for
in the middle of class. But disruptive and confrontational students are sometimes
an unavoidable challenge. If handled poorly, these confrontations can lead to power
struggles — and more disruptions.
Fortunately, many educators have
developed strategies for dealing with
confrontational students. At the top
of the list: “Never get into a power
struggle,” says Mary Barela, a middle
school teacher in Fort Collins,
Colorado. “You are the adult and
know better. If the conversation feels
like it is slipping toward a power
struggle, find a way to change the
course.”
That may feel like it is easier said
than done, so we asked educators for their advice on defusing tense situations with
students. Here's their list of Dos and Don’ts.
Dos
•
ENGAGE STUDENTS BY PROVIDING A “HOOK” FOR EACH LESSON AT THE
BEGINNING TO KEEP THEM THINKING AND INTERESTED.
Dr. Robert Feller from the University of Washington believes these hooks prevent
potential disruptions and stimulate students’ minds so they focus on the upcoming
lesson. Teachers can do anything from a simple science experiment or a game that
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“Attention grabbers may be used to provoke thought, facilitate active learning, or
just share experiences, says retired teacher LaNelle Holland in Whitesburg,
Georgia. “The teacher who asks challenging questions stimulates student interest.
Empower your students by encouraging them to participate in activities of the
whole group or in smaller groups.”
•
TRY TO UNDERSTAND THE STUDENT’S BACKGROUND AND HOME LIFE.
Problems at home or a difficult home life are often a reason for disruptive children.
If you know where your students are coming from, you are in a better position to
relate. Author and education researcher Dr. Elise Trumbull believes that a
connection with students creates a level of respect and trust between students and
the teachers. If teachers can start to understand students’ cultures better, a
partnership can be formed between school and the home with the parents.
“Taking the time to learn about a child’s background can make the difference
between compassion and callousness,” says retired teacher Diane Postman of
Yorktown, Virginia. “Knowing a child is dealing with family issues or poverty can
lead a teacher to make allowances or adaptations to help a struggling child
succeed. This can ward off some behavioral problems and help the child to save
face.”
•
MAKE IT A TEACHING MOMENT.
When a disagreement or confrontation arises, show the student how to deal with it
in a dignified manner and maintain the integrity of your classroom. Frank Iannucci,
a math and computer science teacher from West Orange, New Jersey, says teachers
should immediately stop the confrontation and arrange to discuss it with the
student in a mature, adult manner, regardless of the age of the student, after the
period. This demonstrates to students that fights can be stopped before they get out
of hand.
Amy Van Wormer of St. Petersburg, Florida, agrees. “Respectfully remind them of
why there are there, and continue with the lesson. If [the behavior] continues,
request to meet [the student] privately outside of the class,” she says. “[Ask the
student] to make the right choices and ask why they are having trouble doing the
right thing.”
•
REACT IN A WAY THAT ALLOWS THE STUDENT TO SAVE FACE.
Never engage a student in front of classmates. It embarrasses the student in public,
sends a message that you don’t care for the student’s feelings, and could potentially
escalate the situation.
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“Maintain control of your own actions and somehow find a way to give the
disruptive student an ‘out’ so that he or she can back down without losing too much
face,” says Barela. “Another option, if possible, is to remove the student from the
learning environment so that the two of you can deal with the issue privately. Even
taking a short walk out in the hall can do wonders for both of you.”
Don’ts
•
REACT TO EVERY LITTLE DISTRACTION UNLESS IT IS DISTRACTING OTHER
STUDENTS.
If you react to everything that goes on in a classroom, you’ll lose too much valuable
teaching time. If the primary problem is one child’s behavior, you can talk to him or
her in private, but as long as the student isn’t disrupting the class, it’s not worth
stopping instruction to address a situation.
Linda Marino, a special education teacher in Mexico, New York, has one method to
avoid power struggles. “I have certain students who love to instigate and distract
each other, so I made distraction tickets. I give students a ticket when they ignore
the negative behavior of another and do not let that student distract them. At the
end of the day, we have a lottery drawing with the daily distraction tickets and the
winner gets a special prize from me.”
•
LET THE STUDENT GET A RISE OUT OF YOU.
Keep your composure while dealing with students, because disruptive students will
look for any opening to create chaos. You need to be a role model for students and
show how to properly deal with an argument.
“Don't get ‘in their face’ and stay calm!” says Holland. “Also, don’t take it
personally. Kids run rampant on emotions and if handled correctly, you can usually
keep it under control.”
•
ATTEMPT TO GET THE LAST WORD.
Fighting for the last word in an argument only prolongs the argument. Try to
understand where the student is coming from, but don’t add more fuel to the fire by
adding a quick jab at the end.
According to Christopher Perillo, a high school science teacher in Kenosha,
Wisconsin, “Teachers who insist on having the last word are bringing themselves
down to a juvenile level. Students will remember this and that teacher’s value will
be diminished.”
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It is much better to focus on what you don’t understand by using “I statements” and
“feeling statements” rather than “you statements.” This will allow the student to
explain instead of argue their point. It also allows the student to understand that
the teacher isn’t trying to pin them into a corner or assess blame, but rather
understand the student’s actions.
“We all can get angry at some point in our lives, but how we deal with it
constructively is important,” says Patrice Palmer, a second-grade teacher in Las
Vegas, Nevada. “Using ‘I’ messages and not ‘you, you, you’ messages is important
because it doesn’t put someone on the defensive.”
Following these dos and don’ts should help you run a smoother classroom and
allow students to be academically engaged instead of engaging in arguments.
Illustration By Dave Clark
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random | 2014/11/20
“Im a student and teacher are just mean ”
random | 2014/11/20
“Im a student and teacher are just mean ”
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Korg Mungork | 2014/09/23
“My teaching supervisor has told me not to do any single activity for more than 10 mins,
because modern students can't pay attention long enough. And I teach ADULTS!”
Brandon Barnes | 2014/09/09
“Pity our teachers: evidently whether a teacher is due respect is predicated entirely on
their continued ability to keep things "interesting."”
JANE | 2014/08/14
“STUDENTS MIGHT HAVE NO RESPECT TOWARDS THEIR TEACHER BECAUSE
TEACHER ITSELF DOESN'T KNOW HOW TO RESPECT STUDENTS... respect is
something you can only have if you have it yourself..it started to you..you're a model
right?”
JANE | 2014/08/14
“STUDENTS MIGHT HAVE NO RESPECT TOWARDS THEIR TEACHER BECAUSE
TEACHER ITSELF DOESN'T KNOW HOW TO RESPECT STUDENTS... respect is
something you can only have if you have it yourself..it started to you..you're a model
right?”
JANE | 2014/08/14
“IT DEPENDS ALSO OF YOUR ATTITUDE... BECAUSE STUDENTS DON'T WANT A
PLASTIC TEACHER, THEY WANTED A TRUE TEACHER WHOM THEY CAN CALL
SECOND PARENT..WHO TRULY UNDERSTAND THEM.. BEING A TEACHER IS NOT
JUST A PROFESSION OR JUST A WORK..IT'S A MATTER OF LIFE LONG
RELATIONSHIP TOWARDS YOUR STUDENTS...YOU CONTRIBUTE LOVE, TRUST
AND HOPE FOR YOUR STUDENTS ”
Substitute teacher | 2014/06/02
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expectations and little time with their. In addition most parents tendency is to protect their
children no matter what. Other children are the exact reflection of their parents. I believe
that things would be different if one of the parents would stay home or work part-time to
raise their children appropiately. Many parents prefer the extra money to obtain more
material items. I speak from experience. I have been working as a part-time substitute
teacher in the Houston area for the last 15 years. My husband and I realized that focusing
on our children's education and being there when they need me was more important than
all of the money I would have made had I continue my professional career. Today we are
proud parents of two young ladys. The oldest one with two degrees. She graduated with
honor in nursing school and has an outstanding job at a very reputable hospital. The
youngest one has always been an honor roll student and is currently following her sister's
footsteps. Thanks to God neighter one had a broken heart nor pregancies. I never
received a negative call from their teachers. However, I was always complimented for
such well behaved and smart girls. It makes me sad to see such a decline in student's
academic performance and grades. Worst of all every year students are more
disrespectful with parents, teachers and administrators.”
Justgottasay | 2014/03/31
“Tucker - your post HAD to be facetious, right? Please tell me it is so I won't have to go on
a lengthy tirade about teacher responsibilities. I mean, wow, we are supposed to make
our lessons engaging to a room full of 38 different personalities with different interests.
What engages the child that pokes himself with a pencil and lays on the floor, may not be
engaging to the student who thinks the kid on the floor is an idiot for wasting the class'
time. So, Tucker, just in case you WERE serious, how are we to adjust our teaching styles
to interest and excite ALL of them simultaneously? ”
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